Painful
by SchrodingersMonster
Summary: How Gabriel convinces Sam to say no to Lucifer. Slightly erotic and kinda dark!fic but happy ending c: enjoy!


**I DO NOT KNOW WHAT THIS IS**  
**I LITERALLY JUST WOKE UP WITH THIS IN MY HEAD**  
**oOoOo oOoOo oOoOo**

At first, Sam doesn't tell anyone. He keeps it to himself, locked away in his conciousness like a dirty little secret. And he supposes it is, really. But at the same time, Sam has always been slightly jealous of the bond his older brother and Castiel share. It's not as if they mean to not include him on purpose, but nonetheless, Sam always feels like he's missing out on something.

So, no, he decides against telling them that Gabriel visits him in his dreams almost every night.  
Sometimes he's the Trickster, all poking fun and twinkle-in-the-eye, and sometimes he's the Archangel, with wings hidden in shadow and a longer life span than is even comprehendable to a human.

They talk. Sometimes it's about Lucifer, or the approaching apolcalypse, or Hell. And sometimes it's light conversation, will it rain tomorrow, where he ate dinner. It varies. At first, Sam is loath to talk to Gabriel at all, telling him to fuck off and stay out of his head. But the archangel keeps coming back, and eventually Sam realizes something; Gabriel cares. Genuinely, really cares. So they talk. It is friendly, but there is something else there, something Sam doesn't really know how to approach.

So Sam keeps his mouth shut. Until it happens.

The three of them are sitting in a booth in a diner on the side of a highway. Dean is bitching about the Striga they're currently hunting, which has dragged them across two states in active pursuit. Castiel is listening and murmuring his formal sympathy. Sam is trying to tune out his brother. He's just about to kick him under the table when a hand falls on the younger brother's shoulder and a sardonic voice says, "Can I take your order?" Sam looks up so fast he's surprised his neck doesn't snap.

Standing there was Gabriel, complete with the diner's uniform, hat, and nametag. He is smirking as if he knows something no one else does, as usual.

"Gabriel?" Castiel sounds startled. "Why are you here?" Dean is glaring bloody murder across the table.  
Meanwhile, Sam can barely breathe. His heart is suddenly pounding, scared that the archangel will tell his comrades about the dreams. He swallows audibly as Gabriel's hand slides up his shoulder and comes to rest on the back of his neck, fingers scratching slightly in a way that is both comforting and something else Sam doesn't want to put a name to.

"Just checking up, lil bro." Gabriel says, smirk still firmly in place. "Are you gonna order or what?" Castiel and Dean order their usual, with Dean looking like he's about to cut off the hand that's touching Sam if they weren't in a restaurant. As Sam opens his mouth to order, Gabriel slides his fingers forward to stroke casually down Sam's neck, and he falters as electricity and something trails along his skin. The archangel's smirk widens to a full blown grin, as if he can hear Sam's enjoyment, and he does it again. Sam's mind blanks as he unconciously leans into the touch, and he shuts his eyes in an effort to gain his focus back.

Castiel is watching curiously, not interfering, but simply observing. Dean, on the other hand, looks like he's about to blow a gasket.

"Leave him alone, you feathery piece of shit." The older Winchester snaps. His face employs the phrase "If looks could kill". Gabriel slowly withdraws his hand, staring Dean down until he looks away, and Sam frowns as the warmth disappears.

Gabriel looks down at Sam and says "See you around, kiddo." Before turning and walking into the kitchen. Dean mutters angrily and scowls for the next 20 minutes, and when their food comes, it is not Gabriel who brings it, but a pimply-faced teenager. Dean makes Castiel check it for poison first before taking a bite.

Sam picks at his admittedly delicious caesar salad (his favorite), mulling over the whole encounter. He has no idea what just happened, but he resolves to ask Castiel about it when he has a moment away from Dean.

His older brother has the good sense to wait until they're out of the restaurant before exploding.

"What the fuck was that, Sam?!" Dean yells, looking angry but also... worried.

Sam's mouth sets into a hard line. "Can we not talk about this?" He mutters, speeding up to get to the Impala faster. His older brother opens his mouth to say something else but Castiel stops him with a hand on the shoulder and a quiet "Dean."

It's not until they're halfway down the road that Sam realizes he never actually ordered anything off the menu. He doesn't dream that night.

**oOoOo oOoOo oOoOo**

The next time it happens, Sam is alone.

He is sitting on the shitty, twin bed designated to him, tapping away at his laptop as he researches wraiths. And then, suddenly, there are hands ghosting over his back, touching lightly but firmly as heat flows out.

"Gabriel." Sam breathes out. He can almost hear the grin in the archangel's voice when he says, "Miss me Sasquatch?" Sam hums a yes, shutting his laptop and putting it on the bedside table, and Gabriel practically purrs his approval.

"How're you... doing that?" Sam grinds out, trying desperately to make his mind and mouth cooperate as the archangel works him over.

"What? Doing this?" Gabriel is drawing Enochian symbols on the younger Winchester's back, but when he speaks, the something flares up and increases tenfold, and Sam has to gasp a little. He nods in understanding, because words are too hard.

"It's my Grace."

Sam almost loses what little control he has left at the absolute intimacy of that.

"...Why?" And that one word is so much work that it almost doesn't pass his lips. Gabriel stops his ministrations, and Sam instantly wishes he hadn't asked.

The archangel's voice is right at his ear, words curling off his tongue like erotica. "Because, Samuel Winchester, you need help. You're getting closer and closer to saying yes to my dear brother Lucifer every day." It's like he's reading from Sam's soul. "And I won't let that happen. I chose your side, and now I'm going to make damn sure it's the winning side. So I'm letting you feel my Grace, and the next time you want to give up, to let the devil in, you think of this and you tell him 'not today'." Gabriel's fingers are at his neck once again, a sensitive spot Sam didn't even know he had. His fingers stroke gently for a minute before he digs his fingernails in and scratches suddenly, Sam's sharp intake of breath only egging him on.

When Sam thinks of it later, he will be utterly confused. He's messed around with guys before, sure. In college, and at other times, when the normality of sex with a woman becomes too much to bear. But he's never felt such a deep need, almost like his soul is calling out to touch Gabriel's, to feel the power of an Archangel running through him.

He understands now, how Dean and Castiel are that connected. They almost don't need to speak to communicate.

"They don't." Gabriel grunts from behind him. _And neither do we_.

Sam is astounded. _What is this?_

_A preview._

_Of?_ Sam both wants to know, and doesn't.

_What can happen if you say no._

And suddenly Gabriel is gone, and so is the warmth of his Grace. Sam huffs in frustration, and flops back on the bed, defeated.

oOoOo oOoOo oOoOo

A few nights later, it happens.

Sam wakes up in a garden, sun shining and birds chirping, as if everything is happy and perfect and serene.

"Hello, Samuel." He would know that voice anywhere. The younger Winchester turns to see Lucifer smiling confidently at him. "The big night is finally here."

Sam frowns. "I have no idea what you're talking about." Lucifer stalks closer to Sam, like a predator who knows when his prey is caught.

"Tonight is the night you're going to say yes to me." He's right in Sam's personal space now, breath fanning out over his face.

"No, it's not." It probably would have sounded a lot more confident if his voice hadn't trembled. Lucifer just laughs delightedly and leans forward to whisper in Sam's ear.

"C'mon, Sammy. Let's not play games anymore. Give in to me. Let me take the reins. It'll be easy, and the reward will be greater than you can even imagine. You can forget about Jessica's death, and Madison's, and your dear old daddy's. You can stop feeling criticised by Dean and Castiel, stop being looked down upon, even... hated." And damn him but it sounds so tempting that Sam almost says yes right then and there.

But then he thinks of Gabriel.

He thinks of all the angel has sacrificed, all he has been through.

Sam thinks of the hope the archangel gave Castiel when he agreed to help them instead of fight them.

And most of all, he thinks of the goodness he feels whenever Gabriel's Grace touches him.

It's like nothing he's ever experienced before. It's the most pure thing he's ever felt, the most sensual thing he's ever tasted, and he never wants to forget it. It is a polar opposite to the dirty, cheap taste of demon blood. Instead of fueling his fire, it douses it completely. Instead, Gabriel's Grace makes him feel whole.

"Not today, Lucifer." And Sam shoves him back. The shock on the devil's face is worth what happens next.

All at once the garden is gone, and Sam is in what he assumes is Hell. It is dark, and the wind is howling, loud and full of agony, and occaisionally lightning cracks and all he can see is blood.

Somehow, over the screaming of the wind, he can hear Lucifer.

"You will say yes, Sam. It cannot be any other way." He is angry now, and what Sam used before as an escape ladder, he uses now as armor.

"Tough. It is this way. I will never say yes to you. Not today, not tomorrow, not ever. Because now I have something to fight for. Something to live for. If you don't like it, get the fuck off my planet." And Sam wakes up.

oOoOo oOoOo oOoOo

Of course, he tells Dean and Castiel all that transpired in his dream.

Dean grins and high fives Sam childishly, then goes to make a beer run so they can "celebrate."  
Castiel tells Sam that this is a "very promising development" and disappears to do God-knows-what.

And then Sam is alone, but not really, because he turns and Gabriel is leaning back in a chair, boots on the table and his trademark smirk in place. He looks all Trickster, the only Archangel thing about him is the ring of gold around his eyes. He looks happier than Sam has ever seen him in ages, maybe ever.

"You did it, kiddo." Gabriel pulls a candy bar out of nowhere and bites into it happily.

"Is it over?" Sam asks uncertainly. The angel laughs and shakes his head.

"Not by a longshot." He pauses. "But the hardest part is."

Sam grins and lays back on the bed, all at once exhausted and exuberated. And suddenly Gabriel is on top of him, eyes flashing, grinning ferally.

"Now, how about that reward?"

**oOoOo oOoOo oOoOo**

**I honestly dont know what that was. I wanted to end it on a lighter note than it started out with. Hope you enjoyed, sorry if you didnt!**


End file.
